AES03 The only person you're destined to become, is the person you decided to be (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

It’s been a while since I decided to step into educational world. Teaching just like a flowing river in the family. Back then, I didn’t feel comfortable for being “a teacher’s daughter” since my father and I are in the same school. Being a (somewhat) troublemaker just to show myself separated from my father being. Years after many troubles at school, before entering university level, I remember had this conversation with my mom. She asked me to considering a choice to enter an educational university, but I (with my rebellious thought) refused to do so and gave my unpleasant face. She said softly “You said that you don’t want to be like me, a full-time worker mom. You said it would be nice to have a mom who can spend more time to do things together, cooking meals for the kids, or just being there when your kids need you the most. Being a teacher will give you the ability to do so. That’s why I pursue you to be a teacher”. It took me days to digest those sentences, and well I chose the path. Being a teacher.

 

And here comes the 20’s year of life and having a great time being a teacher at many places. Life brought me in to another phase, being a mother. Remembering my mom’s voice back then, like any other mother, she was right…. she’s always right. I took a part-time teaching job while raising my firstborn. A part-time job turns into a full-time and consumed almost every part of my life. And then comes my second and thirdborn child. It made me realized that this job takes me away from them. Distanced… I stayed on solitude and redirecting myself to them. I want to be a big part in their life. I want to cook their meals, take them wherever they want, or just simply being there when they need me. Well yeah, I lost my pocket money and a status of working mom. As time goes by, while accompanying three little rascals, others said that I educate them really well. Surprise?! Me too…. (here I am listening my own high pitch voice).

 

Contemplation after contemplation, journaling after journaling, discussions, readings, and many things I did to fulfill my hunger of being a good mom. I’m shifting myself from a teacher to an educator. I grow as my children grow. Surprisingly this phenomenon of me is showing not only for my kids. I spread my experiences, knowledges, thoughts, wisdom, recipes, laughter and so on to my kids’ friends while in the same time I absorb anything that can enhanced myself. Happiness inside of me is growing by hearing their stories, watching their silly acts, and wipe away their tears. And teaching or educating for me is not a job anymore. It’s a part of me. It runs into my blood (thanks to the ancestors). I’m raising myself while I raised my kids. I learn a lot for them and from them. First, teaching is just a gate for me to my working era. Now, teaching and educating (while learning at the same time) are my golden gate into my real life. A life which full of lesson. A life where I gained many things (weight is included). Here comes my 40’s year of life and life just begun. I’m not just growing old, I’m growing aweeeesome entering my golden gate. Viva la vida !!!