AES06 Your life, Your Choice

I just don’t understand why people or I guess our society forces us to live the exact same life. It doesn’t make any sense to me, we live once so why should we all have this same template of life. And I often find people that are literally giving themselves a huge amount of pressure to live the way others told them to live. 

The way people live their lives is not a one size fits all situation. Because everyone has a different background, family, culture, etc that really affects the way they live. I just realized this in the middle of a conversation with Kak Fitri, just a few weeks before my final exam in 9th grade. I said “It’s weird how people make these standards when it’s clear that everyone is so different, so what the point of this system. It’s literally killing souls, making people like me feel like Im less than others.” 

It really hurts me when people compare my academic score’s let’s say to my other classmates, it makes me feel so stupid and useless. But then, this comparison isn’t an apple to apple comparison. Because here’s the thing, my friends that are “smart”, they never even thought about the things I’ve been through as a child. How I struggle with my mental health, so young and clueless about what was happening to me. They lived a life that was supporting them to be the “smart” person they are today. And Im far from that, so is the comparison fair? No, it isn’t fair. So I knew that this one-way path is so crazy and unrealistic, since Im not smart to “them” I wanted to show up as my version of smart. In my opinion being smart, cool, fun, clever, successful, etc is about showing up as the best version of yourself and making the most out of it, and always improving yourself. 

Since I started thinking in this new improved way I would say, I felt happier than ever. I may not be good at math, algebra, etc but I speak 3 languages, I am a strong-minded woman with amazing ideas, Im also a kind and loving person that’s willing to always learn. 

People often think that I say these things as an excuse to not fix what Im not good at for example math. But here’s the thing, I put everything into consideration. I learn what I need to learn and what I want to learn. If forcing myself to learn algebra means hurting myself and sacrificing my mental health it’s a no for me. If I ever consider sacrificing something, it has to be worth the price. 

“Why should I live up to people’s expectations instead of my own?” said Kat Stratford from 10 things I hate about you. Her statement really hit me on the spot. So please do know your power, strength, ideas, and keep improving your life that based on your own standards. Do not compare yourself to others, the only comparison that’s expectable is with your past self. So go live your life to the fullest, fill it with happiness in your own way. Always remember that it’s your life to live.