AES78 Setting boundaries

I think my whole life no one has ever really though me what is boundaries, and most people I know don’t even have boundaries. I think helping people, giving people your time and attention is something that is wonderful. But sometimes you really need to know how far you can go with helping people. Because I don’t see the point of helping people to the point that you’re basically sacrificing yourself. 

And most of the time people don’t even realize that they are people pleasers. Including me, I would say 2 years ago I was still stuck in my people pleaser black hole. Because I grew up thinking that helping people to the point I don’t prioritize myself is something that’s really good. In my mind the more I suffer to help people the better. That is absolutely wrong. Because when you help someone and you hurt yourself, it’s pointless. Because if the person that you helping really cares about you they wouldn’t let you hurt yourself for their needs. 

So I learned that saying no is okay, as long as you say it in a polite and respectful way. I don’t think it should be offensive to say no because it is actually your responsibility to take care of yourself. Why should we be scared to do something to keep ourselves healthy and save both physically and mentally? And it’s not selfish because you have considered helping that person but in reality, let’s say you can’t because you’re so tired. As a good human being, you considered helping them, but you can’t. At this moment you tell them that you can’t because you’re exhausted. You have proved yourself to be true to yourself, by admitting that you are exhausted. That is one of the values that we tend to forget.

picture: https://id.pinterest.com/pin/653373858447738546/